Wednesday, May 28, 2008


Summer is here and I am starting a summer internship soon. Will it be the beginning of a new chapter in my life, or just a side note? I hope it is the start of something new and exciting. Sometimes I hope the future will come sooner because I want it to be good and have a happy ending. Right now there are many uncertainties and I don't really like to operate with too many unknowns. My brain works better with numbers and factual statements like I will do X on day Y. Recently I've noticed that I don't remember things well. I am not sure if I am always like that or my memory has gotten worse. I still have trouble eating mushrooms but some people tell me it is good for brain functions.

Amy has come to the East Coast to visit me and Jenn and my mom. We are having a good time doing many fun activities. After rock climbing and canoeing, we were pretty exhausted. I feel my arm has gotten thicker by a quarter inch. It is nice to feel strong. I want to do more of those activities. It is more fun than lifting weights in the gym.

Last night we were watching The Heartbreak Kid, where a 40 year old guy who had been apprehensive of marriage finally decided to marry a woman whom he met and dated for 6 weeks. After that, he found many things about her that he doesn't like. The movie seems exaggerated, which makes it funny. I think when two people come together, they go from two very unique individuals with their own strengths and pitfalls to become one unit that sort of has the best parts of both. That's what I think a successful union, but it takes a lot of effort, compromise, giving, and love to achieve. It is not something just happens automatically. It doesn't stay that way forever either; it requires constant maintenance too, because people are constantly changing, however slowly that may be.

So what is marriage? Some people don't think the act of marriage is important in the sense that you get a piece of paper from court saying you are married, and now you are allowed to call someone your husband or wife. There is a difference in how people perceive you if you have a girlfriend or if you have a wife, and people may not take you seriously if you are not married. One thing for sure is that the act of marriage, along with the ceremony, tells everyone that you are committed to sharing your life with someone until the end of time. This is the ultimate commitment and the most important part of the whole act. Why do you make such a big deal out of it? I think the commitment is stronger than anything else, including those to your parents and children.

I think in a harmonious family, spouse comes first, then your children, and then your parents. Some people think they should place their parents first, but there are 4 of them, which one do you listen to if they don't agree among themselves? Some parents may educate their children to place parents first, but that's a selfish act in itself. I don't think that will create a harmonious family structure. Children should be next, because you didn't choose your parents, but you chose to have children, so your responsibility for their well being and future is greater than that for the parents. I am not saying parents are worthless and you should ignore them and let them live their late life in misery. Parents no doubt contributed a lot for who you are today, and they often prefer to spend time with their children and need assistance from the children, so I think you should try your best to accommodate them if you have the resources to do so. If you don't, you might regret it when they are gone.